Cocaine Wipes detect drugs in the Swedish Parliament

Cocaine Wipes Detect Drugs in the Swedish Parliament

The Coked-Up Corridors of Power

You won’t believe what reporters at Aftonbladet magazine just uncovered – traces of cocaine all over the party rooms and bathrooms in Sweden’s national parliament building, the Riksdag. Yes, you read that right – the people making laws for the entire country have allegedly been getting high off while on the job.

MPs Caught with Their Pants Down

The damning evidence comes from investigative journos using special cocaine swabs to wipe down surfaces, which then turned telltale shades of blue where the party powder was present. The swabs were then sent to a lab for testing, which confirmed the reliability of the positive results.

The journalists sampled the Left Party, Social Democrats, Liberals, Centre Party and even the right-wing Sweden Democrats’ digs – and found the devil’s dandruff in every single one.

So who’s sniffing up all that stuff? The parties are pointing fingers, claiming it could’ve been any old visitor using their facilities. But Jimmie Ã…kesson, the straight-laced leader of the Sweden Democrats, says he’s all for mandatory drug testing to sniff out the culprits. And you know what? I’m kinda feeling that too…

Public Fury Over Powder-Puffing Pollies

Unsurprisingly, the Swedish public is hopping mad about this narco-parliamentary scandal. Social media is going bonkers, with people tearing these alleged powder-snorters new nostrils left, right and centre. There are more memes than you can poke a straw at, absolutely eviscerating our esteemed elected officials.

Let’s be honest here: discovering party powder in the centres of power is a terrible look. If it’s true, these MPs need to get their snouts out of the trough and start showing some bloody accountability. Because you can bet your last line that no ordinary Swedish worker could turn up coked out of their mind without getting instantly fired.

Line in the Sand for Illicit Legislators?

To their credit, the parliamentary bigwigs are taking it seriously, filing a police report and vowing a security crackdown to ensure this unacceptable situation never happens again. They insist politicians must be drug-free to properly serve the people.

But what does “taking it seriously” really mean here? Random drugs tests for all politicians and staff? Narcotics sniffing dogs on patrol? Installing cameras in the bathrooms?? Surely there has to be a line that’s gone too far in policing the personal lives and small missteps of public servants.

I don’t know about you, but when even the right-wing populists are the loudest voices calling for discipline, you know things have gotten outrageously out of hand. The Riksdag clearly has an ethics crisis on its hands – and its leaders need to get a firm grip on restoring integrity and public trust, quickly. No more snowblind shenanigans in the halls of Swedish power!

Photo by Oscar Nord on Unsplash

Zoom Testing is a leading UK drug testing company and a supplier of Drug Test Kits.

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